Self•Care Religion 🖤💫
New Year, “New Me”?
Hello all! Firstly let me introduce myself since it’s been at least 6 years since I’ve written a blog post.
You may call me SKYY and I am the CEO & Founder of The Resilient Lotus.
This past year has been full of growth and self awareness for me.
Considering the first of the new year is literally around the corner, I am sure many of you guys have resolutions or things you want to accomplish and even habits you want to incorporate into your life. You may have gotten a gym membership, new planner & even made a vision board.
There’s nothing wrong with that except -
Are you doing these things because you want to and feel these are the best ways to achieve your goals? Or are you doing this because the rest of the world is too?
I started my gym membership again after about 1-2 year hiatus (school and working full time will do that to you) back in October.
I have a new planner because in middle school I was forced to have one - and now I actually enjoy picking out the planner with the best layout for my goals & using it every year.
For the first time in years I actually want to make a vision board or my version of one.
But there are some things that I learned in 2018 that I definitely want to continue this year.
I started this ritual in the summer of 2018 when job applications within the same company weren’t going my way and I felt undervalued by the company I work for. Countless applications, interviews, shadow days and chronic migraines while working night shift and doing school full time was taking a toll on me. I felt out of control. I hate that feeling.
I realized months later that I only felt out of control because I wasn’t accepting of reality.
“It’s not what you know but who you know”
It wasn’t necessarily what I knew as I realized many job advancements were reserved for their best friends or someone on day shift because they knew them. It wasn't reserved for an eager night shift worker. It wasn’t only me who suffered from this , other colleagues applied - and was denied because they perferred someone from day shift.
During this time I could tell my health was taking a jab for the worst. Considering my migraines occurred more frequently than before and more intense - Excedrin was the only thing that helped me out in anyway.
Excedrin (unless you take Excedrin PM) has caffeine in it - and caffeine between taking the pills with Coca Cola and drinking coffee to start my shift - my fibrocystic / fibradenomas reappeared and grew in size. This a trip to the comprehensive breast center was a necessity.
Again, feeling out of control in my career life and health made me realize:
I am not accepting reality.
Accepting reality does not mean you are okay with what is happening. I have tried all options, I have tried my best and this is the reality. For now.
During this his time of increased mental stress not mentioning any other outliers that could have contributed to the disappointments - I had to start pampering myself more and more. It doesn’t have to be expensive. It doesn’t have to be time consuming. It just has to be meaningful.
But this isn't just a "do this one time and your whole life will change forever" this is a habit that you have to ENJOY committing to.
During high stress times I would actually prioritize to do these things more often.
Yes, when you’re already at your wits’ ends you must yet add another thing to the checklist.
1. Everyone has to shower, right?
My showers are epic. I turn the lights OFF and shower by candlelight. Candles aren’t only reserved for bath time or dropping a load off.
Creating a peaceful moment where there aren’t interruptions (usually) and you can get yourself in the right mindset and let some negative feelings go is ideal in this setting. Set the mood and save a little on your electricity at the same time.
2. Everyone’s addicted to their cell phone these days. Use it for some self care time.
You already have your phone on you. Why not turn on some chillhop or your favorite Alina Baraz album?
Don’t know what I’m talking about? Here’s my Spotify playlist so you can join in.
You can even make your own shower playlist of your favorite hits. Music 🎶 is therapeutic. Use it to your advantage.
3. Setting your intentions, while naked.
While you’re in the shower, focus on what you want to release or speak positive affirmations to set the tone for your day. Then of course have a dance break (don’t fall) to your Cardi B (or any artist that makes you feel empowered) to remind yourself you’re a boss of your life and you can handle what comes your way ✨
Once out of the shower moisturize while, you guessed it, setting intentions and loving yourself.
I look in the mirror every time I get out of the shower and instead of critiquing my body against standards made by “society” - I give myself some body love. I look at my body with admiration.
"I’m clean, I smell good, I feel good."
Of course I moisturize with Luxe Oil (brought to you by yours truly, The Resilient Lotus) and let the natural aromas take over. It feels extra special because instead of chemicals and preservatives names I can’t pronounce - I am applying organic oils with hair & skin safe scents.
I moistuze from head to toe. Literally. My hair, face & body alllllll get the luxe oil love.
This literally takes 15-20 minutes ( or as long as you want) of your day. Again, you were going to shower anyway, why not make it extra special?
WHAT DID THIS DO FOR ME IN THE LONG RUN?
While no one can avoid difficult times, it doesn’t have to last.
“Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional” - Haruki Murakami
How you decide to handle the pain will show in your results.
I know my worth.
I know my value.
That gives me hope for the future I’m manifesting today.
I gained resilience.
I gained inner peace.
While reflecting and taking extra care of myself I realized you can’t be at the mercy of others. Many may take what they can from you or keep you in a place when you’re ready to grow.
If anyone is going to take care of me, it should be me. I should make myself first priority or no one else will. That was one of the greatest lessons during this time period.
Take care of yourself for yourself. Take care of yourself for those who depend on you. It’s okay to take a day off because your exhausted or need a personal day. It’s okay to take a nap. It’s okay to do whatever you need to do in order to make sure you are okay.
How you treat yourself will set the standards for how others will treat you
with love, SKYY
What products I recommend to take your self-care regimen to the next level.